Journal #2

Garden of I don't care?I really hope not... With the ending of water polo season I hope this will give me the chance to begin focusing on my studies. Senior year is filled with exciting subjects that aren't just waste of time.I've really put my academics to the side while in water polo season. Not really proud of it. I found myself struggling in all of my classes: calculus and physics especially. I see myself trying to take the easy way out of everything and in the end learn nothing from the material. I'm tired too. Even without water polo. The other day my friend said, "Jeffrey, you've really mellowed down since freshmen year." hum...
New found optimism. Despite all of the events that have occured these past few weeks (submitting UC apps, new school policies, ending of water polo) I feel my life is changing for the better. I no longer have anything to contribute to, kinda. It feels a little lonely. I realize I need that. Involvement. Involvement with others to make a whole or just plainly; to help others.
Ms. Silber called me up to the office today. She wants me to tutor for Biology Honors. She kind of demanded that I do it too. I walked into her office today during 4th period and she was like, "Here's his name and phone number. Contact him by today or tomorrow." and I responded with the same smile and "okay, will do." I tutored a guy last year in biology last year too, but I think I need a new approach to teacher. I kind of just sat with him, made him an outline of his material, and answered questions. I don't know if it helped. And I'm going to have to prove to this new guy that I'm smart enough to tutor him. Arg. Does anyone else have this problem? I look like a freshmen.
SAT IIs is also this Saturday. I'm taking Math IIC and Literature. Math. You know. It's math. It's never been my strongest subject because of my tendencies to make careless errors, but I haven't studied for this either because of plain laziness. Why? I don't know what to expect from literature. Mr. Varieur's class I hope is helping me with literature. He's a good teacher, but I still find reading comprehension difficult. Authors ramble a lot. I swear they try to confuse the reader.
I'm looking forward to finishing SATs forever and then going to Chicago. New motivation. New effort.
- Be optimistic
Jeff Jankaew